Lose to myself

I am feel sad and emo now..
Why suddenly remember the dance & yoga life again?? I thought i can forget it?
I admit i miss my dance world so much and couldn't forget it till death..

Am i a loser? I lose to myself...

1st time to give up:
I couldn't accept i stopped dance classes for 3 months, cause i can't catch up all the new skills in a week! YES!! I am so stupid, but no one understand what's the feeling that i had.. I am not strong enough when i was 17 years old, so decided to give up my wonderful and meaningful dance life~
I disappointed a person so deeply until now i still can't forgive myself!


2nd time to give up:
I was back to my world again, i took International Yoga Teacher Training Course..
Started to teaching Yoga,glad that many students also like my class and teaching style..Actually just because i got HER, she makes my teaching skill be the best...
But,it was the 2nd time i disappointed her again..Sorry!! I will never forgive myself...This time,i lose to myself again!!Because of some issues..

My friends, My family, My dance buddies...All of them are supporting and pushing me back to the * Dance World *.....

I am asking myself, is it so hard to make a decision??

I bet no one is understand how's the feeling when i give up the real world of me!

Peoples said: You are born to live in the dance world, God's given you the potentials and so many chances..But why don't you stay and continue??

Now, God gives me the 3rd chances.. But should i?
How come suddenly give me a chance again?? I am not so in a mood!!!